Leclerc spoke better English than his companion; for during the absence of his young mistress in France, he had rested with her family in England. He regarded mademoiselle at this moment, as only the good-humoured French can regard where they are prepared to taunt. -- " Vhat vould you design at de parson, Miss?" demanded he.
" Moi ?" asked Justine. " Rien ! rien !"
"Speak English, Miss," enjoined Leclerc. " Monsieur Vicaire cannot speak de French, and he cannot receive your addresses but in his tongue."
" Vell ," cried mademoiselle, "I vill be sure to address him in his tongue den . Is dat good English?"
" Oh , it is beautiful dat ! " encouraged Leclerc.
" Vell den ," rejoined mademoiselle, "I do vant always to speak de good English for dat I address de vicaire ."
"But, Miss," began Leclerc, " what do you propose to yourself in -- in --" Leclerc was at a loss for a word -- "in -- in killing monsieur le vicaire ?"
"No, sir," answered Justine, indignantly, "I do not propose to myself to kill de vicaire ."
" Regardez un peu ," persisted Leclerc. "You have dressed yourself to-day like de queen of Mesopotamie, and it is altogether to kill de vicaire ."
" Pardonnerez " cried mademoiselle.
" Non . I do say," re-urged Leclerc -- "I do say dat your are vicked against de vicaire -- dat you do vish he vill marry you!"
" Mon Dieu ! est il possible ?" inquired mademoiselle, in amazement.
" C'est certain " rejoined Leclerc. "But hear me, Miss -- I do pray you to hear me, Miss. In your -- vhat do you call dat vord croyance ? Faidth ? Yes, dat is de vord . Vell den , Miss, in your faidth , de parsons do never marry demselves , and it is shameful for your to tempt an English parson to marry himself ."

Mademoiselle entered; and remembering her design of speaking English, she began immediately to reproach her mistress for her tears. -- " Mon Dieu madame!" exclaimed Justine, " vous allez gâter -- vous allez gâter vos beaux yeux ! -- dat is, you go to -- to -- spoil your most beautiful eyes with your crying always . If you cannot content yourself with rest here, why rest you here ? I would not do any such a ting as to me deplaire -- to make myself miserable."
Madame checked the eloquence of Justine, and would not hear any reference to her present situation, rights, or future hopes. But the talent of mademoiselle was captured in every sort of eloquence, and now she turned it to the descriptive. "It is not -- is not gay" said mademoiselle; "no, it is not gay enough at dis Cheriton: dere is noting of de vorld ; I vould have all I did desire far away, and I vould not fatigue myself to rest in dis part unpleasant . Dere is de sea! -- mon Dieu , dere is de sea! very fine! -- il y a -- dere are encore de trees, very, very, very mournful, and de shurch upon de little hill in our face -- vhat sadness!"

This one too could restrain his voice no longer. -- " Faidth , madam, my lard ," cried this idler, "it would be a mighty great pleasure to me to have the hanour to guide your lardship, for I know very well that monsieur le capitaine manes me."
"Are you a sailor?" asked madame, in nearly the same language.
" Is it if I'm a sailor you ask , madam, my lard ?" inquired the same one. " Faidth I'm a sailor too, and that I have bane ever since I was barn . And a little more for your comfort, I am of you own dare country, and that cannot be any other than Ireland, I warrant."
This was a presumption, for none of us had seen a great deal of Ireland, though what we had seen we had much loved. -- "Well then," said madame, you shall be our pilot to -- what do you call the place?"
"Is it the place, my lard ?" inquired the sailor. " Troth , that is called Fecamp, and a most ilegant ville it is for a little out-of-the-way place. You will find there, your hanour , a wanderful abbey, with a swate little chapel to the Holy Virgin, that hardly ever suffers a poor soul to be lost in the sea. Ainsi, monsieur capitaine, je vais vous quitter. Je me chargerai du soin de madame . Madam, I am at your sarvice , and to Fecamp, and plase your hanour , my lard , I consave myself your pilot."
Thus this fresh pilot with the same facility looked, and spoke, and acted. Now English, now French, formed for action, but in love with idleness; [...]

"Well, and your age; that cannot be much, I imagine?" observed madame d'Osterley.
" Exparience is by yares , madame, I am not very yang , for mighty ill-treated I have been."
"But now -- now," continued madame, curious to know the degree of Liffey's prosperity, "but now, after your great difficulties --"
The word did not suit Liffey; he fancied that the great came mockingly. -- "Your pardon, madame, my lard -- je ne voudrais pas -- I mane I would not that your hanour should misunderstand me. My trables were all sent me, and I found it my duty to bear them. They were grate enough for one; but he who is ignorant of all trable , would think very little of mine, were I to endeavour to count them."
"It is perfectly true, very just, Lif -- Liffey, I think you are called?" observed madame.
"Liffey O'Paole is my name, and plase your ladyship; it came down from my grandfather, who came down -- humph! -- from the flood, I belave . Liffey, your hanour , is taken from the ilegant river of Dublin, and Paole comes from -- faidth , I don't know, but from some paol or another, I fancy."
"That is very probable," said madame. "So then, Liffey O'Paole, you have entirely quitted your country, and are become a resident of France?" " Why , resident, if you plase , my lady," answered Liffey; "for it would be an indacent thing for a man not to reside with his wife, the poor cratur !"
[...]
"Married?" inquired madame, with astonishment.
"By the true church, and plase your ladyship, though you may think it a very hard matter," replied Liffey.

"Yes, yes!" observed madame, "it must be a pleasant thing to have a house in such circumstances." "A house and a wife, and plase your ladyship," rejoined Liffey, who seemed determined to have none of his happiness forgotten.
"Assuredly, a house and a wife!" continued madame; "though perhaps, Liffey, you would have been as happy with the house alone?"
" Ah , madame," answered Liffey, with a smile, "it would not be gentale for me to say that, seeing my mighty grate obligation; and it is, moreover, a swate ilegant thing when one is parfectly tired of baring one's trables alone, to throw over at laste one hald of them as the lawful share of one's wife."
"Oh, that must be an amazing pleasure!" cried madame rapidly, and turning away her face. But Liffey knew how to pleasure -- desired to please, and would not that the effect of his efforts should be concealed.
"I cannot but respect my wife, madame," continued Liffey, "for she is old enough to direct me in the parsuits of life."
"Ah," cried madame, "I understand! your wife is rather -- rather -- that is, she is not young?"
" Trath , she is not yang , my lady!" resumed Liffey; "but she is an excellent soul, though a little high, as it were. I will have the pleasure of shewing her to your lardship -- madame I mane , and if you spake the Norman French you will find her conversation vastly lively and instructive; but as for herself, she is grave and grey, much after the manner of her house; and if both were a litter yanger , trath! I do not know that they would be the warse for it; but they shall not catch me complaining, and plase your ladyship, not they!"

"How -- what do you mean?" inquired Claude, smiling at the odd appearance of this inexplicable man; "tell me by whom else I am accompanied?"
" What , dan't you knaw me, maister Clarde ?" asked the once playfellow, and the favourite neighbour of Claude, John Cornish the younger.
"Know you!" cried Claude, his heart rising with pleasure at the voice of his early and always constant friend; [...]

"As the Goddess of Wisdom," said a tall thin Minerva, with a scotch accent. – "I come hither to drive the fools out of this my temple."
"I am sorry we are likely then to lose the honour of your wisdomship's company," observed the Satirist.
" What mon , d' ye mean to cast reflections upon me?"
"A word in your ear, sapient Minerva," returned Sir William, adding in an audible whisper – "Do not bray too loudly, or it may be discovered that an ass is concealed beneath the lion's skin."

" Nae be surprised, gentlemen," she said, "to find, though we have got sic a large and gude hoose , that we prefer the back to the front of it. 'Tis my fancy, and my gude mon loves his Moggy sae weel , that he seldom contradicts her. I prefer comfort to shew , ye ken ; and though I live in my kitchen aw winter, I flatter mysel 'tis as clean as ony parlour in summer. I like the rooms next the street ; but here I can enjoy the morning sun, which delights me during my breakfast. We eat our dinner hot from the fire, and my tea is as gude again when my water is nae carried about frae the kitchen to the parlour; and this ye shall experience, my gude friends, for I wish ye to remember the comfortable dish of tea that ye met with at Sandy Mackintosh's that ye may be tempted to visit us again, though ye were received in a kitchen." [some narrative omitted]
(S)he declared, "if she had but had sic a bairn by her dear Sandy, she should be the happiest woman in aw Britain." [some narrative omitted]
She was pressing them to taste some cracknels , a sort of cake peculiar to the island , when a violent ringing at the street-door made her exclaim-- "Here comes my torment ; step and let the foolish fellow in, Mary," turning to her assistant rather than her servant, "for ten to one if ony of his men are at hame . 'Tis a pure silly body of a Baronet, an Officer in one of the regiments now here, wha , taking advantage of my gude temper, prevailed upon me to take him into my hoose ; but if I could once see the back of him, he should nae darken my doors again." [some narrative omitted] " Ye are parfectly reeght , my gude friend. I have heard this hopeful sprig of Nobility tauk about Winchester." [some narrative omitted]
" Yere fellows, Sir Peter, are nae in my keeping; I nae ken nor care what has got them; perhaps they are gone to the ball."

" Ye cartainly canna refuse to encourage sic a bonny lad, Sir Peter," said the diverted Mrs Mackintosh. "But perhaps, as ye are old schoolfellows, ye may think of providing for him in a more honourable way. 'Tis almost a pity, I tell him, to dirty sae handsome a hand in our filthy business."

It was on one bright sunshiny day in the summer of the sixth year from the event abovementioned, that a gentleman, attended by his servant, arrived in a travelling carriage at a small inn in a village situated in the North of England, and inquired his way to the residence of Lord Arlington. The request was followed by a curtsey and a stare from the fat landlady to whom it was addressed, and then a shrill scream to a slatternly girl, who was carrying a pail across the inn-yard; "Bess -- set down that, and rin for Jim to show the gentleman the way to the Hall."
"Is it far to the Hall ?" inquired the gentleman.
"It will, mayhap , be a short three miles, Sir."
"But if our guide is to go on foot," pursued the traveller, impatient to arrive at the end of his journey, "I am afraid he will hardly keep pace with the carriage. Had you not better direct the driver, if you can, which road he is to follow ?"
" You'11 be for walking up to the Hall, I suppose, Sir," replied the woman with another stare.
"No, I shall go in this carriage."
" I beg your pardon , Sir," said the woman, "but you can't go to the Hall in a carriage."
"No?"
"No, Sir; the road is not over and above good , though I won't say you mightn't go it well enough ; but then, Sir, the gates are locked. But I beg pardon ," with another low curtsey, "perhaps, Sir, you have got a key."
"Indeed I have no such thing," said the traveller; "have you no key here for the accommodation of visitors?"
" Laws! Sir, there never comes no visitors here," said the landlady; " we are not allowed to have no key : they've keys at the Hall, and we sent for one aforetime for a gentleman as called , but we couldn't get it. We'll send for one now, if your honour pleases; and if you'll be so good as to walk in and take a little dinner, I dare say you'll get the key in less than a couple of hours,--that is, if they send it at all."
"Thank you, my good woman; but in that case I prefer proceeding immediately on foot; my servant shall remain here with the carriage, and Jem, whom you called for, shall be my guide to the Hall."
"I suppose, Sir," said the landlady, as the traveller was departing, "you know that nobody is never let in to look at the house ; but if you have business with my Lord or Mr. Bennet the steward, that's another matter."